Thursday, July 28, 2011

THIS is why being single sucks

Look at the following scenarios and try to answer honestly. Note: Any resemblance of this post to actual people and real circumstances is...purely coincidental.

1) Your roommate asks you to help him cook for a bunch of people that are coming over for a football party (NOT your party), then asks you a couple days later when you're going to clean up your dishes. What color does your face turn?

2) Your roommate opens a can of chili for dinner and decides he doesn't actually want it. He leaves it there, opened and untouched, for over two days. You go into the kitchen several days after to clean up and find this sitting on the counter. If your anger were a shape (rocket launcher, battle axe, grenade, light saber), what would it be?

3) In desperation you stop cleaning the house so maybe your roommates will start cleaning - at least sometimes. Your house subsequently starts to smell like a bacterial science laboratory and they still don't budge. At this point, how would you characterize your mood?

4) You make a delicious dinner and ask your roommate (not your favorite but you're trying to be nice) if he wants some. He responds by dishing up a huge portion then taking four bites and leaving the rest for the flies. Which blunt object comes to mind first?

5) You've been telling your roommate for a couple weeks now about a girl you want to ask out. Just after going on your first date with her, he asks her out. You only find out because the girl sees both of you and laughs at the coincidence that you are roommates. Yes...what a coincidence. What action do you take as soon as she walks away?

Depending on your answers, you may want to consider not being single.

Sunday, July 24, 2011

The Unexpected Stuff

I spent this weekend in Southern Utah at Zion's National Park - one of the most beautiful things I've ever seen. While there I went to church at a nearby ward. Sacrament meeting was last and we arrived a bit late, so we shuffled directly into the sacrament meeting room where people were gathering.

Side note: in primary I used to love playing any song I knew. I'd only been taking piano lessons for a year but I would rush up with my "simplified hymns" songbook and accompany the primary. To this day I can't (neither can my mom) believe I did that...on a regular basis.

Fast-forward: I was sitting in the chapel listening to all the people chatting loudly as we waited for the meeting to start. I tried to think of what I could do to help people quiet down and get ready for the sacrament and decided to go up and play prelude. My friend from that ward looked at me weird when I told him, but I went anyway and played for a bit. When a man with a lesson manual stood in front of the class I realized it wasn't sacrament, it was sunday school. People normally don't play prelude for sunday school, but they probably didn't think I was normal. I slowly closed the piano and went back to my seat with a slightly embarrassed grin on my face. "Oh well", I thought, "none of these people will remember me five minutes from now." I spoke too soon.

The teacher thanked me for playing and said "that fits perfectly in with the lesson today." My grin slowly went away. "How many of you could describe, without looking around, the person who was just playing prelude? What can you tell me about him?" About midway through his question I began to wish I'd been a little less proactive and left the piano alone. Then I wished I'd been a little slower getting ready for church. As he finished his question, my wishing focused more on hoping their comments would be kosher. It only takes one crazy old lady with a crazy sense of humor and suddenly my face is making fresh tomatoes look pale. Luckily, they only said I had hair that wasn't receding and I was probably married. It's sad that the one fact they got right was that I didn't have a receding hair line. Still, it could've been worse.

I couldn't help but laugh at having played prelude for sunday school in a ward I've never attended before and then being used for a mildly embarrassing object lesson. Thanks Orderville, Utah for keeping me on my toes.

Saturday, July 16, 2011

A Little Music

People always say that it's just the stage of life I'm in, but there are moments when I have no idea where I'll be 6 months from now or what I'll be doing then. That's a little frustrating. On my better days I do what I can and plan what I can and leave the rest to the Lord.

On my not so good days I try to push the envelope and force things to happen. Somebody really wise told me that trying to do things in my timetable rather than the Lord's is like putting a masterful symphony on fast-forward. It isn't a masterful symphony without the precise timing.

Things to think about.